Up & Running

Siom runs through Marjane Supermarket with [Simone's] shopping trolley. This was about the halfway mark.

Well not so much running as...

Let me explain. Running loses out in the Great Luggage Misplacement. Half my stuff stuck in Casa [blanca]. Naturally this includes warm clothes and tracky bottoms. No I'm not going to charge round the mountain in the five pairs of shorts that did arrive. Think cold, wet and... Ramadan. My apologies to Muslim readers of the blog, but I simply cannot enjoy it.

Morocco Lesson 1: On the first days of Ramadan, it is ok to scream at others. Step 1. Approach suitable person [eg customs official, policeman - I promise I saw this - or complete stranger in market]. Step 2. Insert face. Step 3. Yell. I witnessed FIVE incidents in my first 24 hours.

And then there is the fact that people WALK here. As a matter of course.

Mohammed Akkoui [Head of Housing, Saviour of Simone]: I'll show you the short cut to the market.

Mohammed Akkoui [Head of Housing; Most Helpful Person in World Nominee]: I'll show you the way to the souq.

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MoHammed [pathetic attempt by Simone to get her throat around the Arabic 'H' sound] not only shows me how to get to these places but marches me round teaching me how to shop and what things should cost.

Morocco Lesson 2: Apart from mobile phone calls, things are bloody cheap here. 1 kilo fresh tomatoes. Market price: 5 Dirhams. Souq price: 3 Dirhams. AED 1.2 dhs. Aussie 38 cents. US 34 cents.

AND I am now the proud owner of a 'brand new' second hand granny shopping trolley.

MoHammed the Helpful with Pre-Loved Trolley. A bargain at 70 dirhams.

I am also the owner of massively painful tendons. Well duh. Do you know how many years it has been since I walked for an entire day in FLAT SHOES? I can tell you. August 2007. Edinburgh. Cobble stones. Had to spend the remainder of holiday in pumps in the Outer Hebrides [inappropriate dress reaching new lows] in order to avoid tendon agony.

Scenes from the Souq, pronounced 'Sock' in Moroccan Arabic. Another useful item still stuck in Casa.

Worst thing is, tendon problem cannot be addressed by long hot bath. Apartment huge but no bath. Issue of adapting other receptacle for tub use. MoHammed still thinking. Things like, "god spare me more lunatic Australians."

Morocco Lesson 3: More Ifrane where I live than Morocco in general. There is no junk food. Where would you find it? There are no supermarkets. Can't imagine the little old garlic seller - oh my god, Moroccan garlic!!! - weighing up packs of Salt & Vinegar in his metal trays?

So, as you can see, the move is a work in progress. Stress levels as a yo-yo. Expect to emerge in the not too distant future with a livable flat [complete with bath tub - if necessary the family downstairs has a kiddies swimming pool which surely they will not need for long?], a happy cat [kitty litter and cat biccies purchased along with much else in Fes which DOES have a supermarket with the help of Siom, a very fine, recently initiated member of Team Simone, and, possibly, even a car.

My kitchen. Yes, that is an open fire place.

Sunset from my window after rain.

Night time from my window.

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Ant at Matthew's in Dubai. Photo sent by Matthew to reassure Simone. Simone badly in need of reassurance. Yes, the very best real estate agent in the world has been minding small noxious beastie who has been catching up on TV on his sofa. Ant's arrival is being managed by Meryem [Wonder Administrator], and me with much trepidation. Cargo not a Moroccan forte.

On the drive to Ifrane. You can see why I need a car.

So the time has come to book your tickets. Fly into Casa, and leave immediately. Place is a hole. Stay at Rabat or Fes, arriving by second class train. From Fes, take Grande Taxi to Ifrane. Cost 25 dirhams. Although Crushed Bum Syndrome can be avoided by booking both front seats. Cost 50 dirhams. Cost of entire taxi 150 dirhams.

Morocco Lesson 4: In Morocco, there are two types of vehicle. White plated cars, bought and registered here. Yellow-plated cars. Bought overseas registered here temporarily, and meant to be removed within the year. Not much certainty on the time or the rules exists, however.

Much advice on what to do. Buy yellow! No, white! It's cheaper! Easier! No! yellow car must be driven out of country. No! it's ok when you have a working visa. No! it's okay only if you drive it in the country because the legal owner has left.

Oh oh.

Simone to Jasmin (MoHammed's Boss]: What happens if you have an accident in un-owned vehicle?

Jasmin: Oh, you're still covered by insurance.

Simone: By what about the POLICE???!!!

Jasmin: Oh, well it's not illegal to drive someone else's car. It's only illegal if they do. And no one actually owns the car if you buy it.

Sigh. Clearly there is much to be learnt. Including Arabic. I refuse to learn French. Come soon. MoHammed has promised me TWO sofa beds.

Simone the Soon-To-Be-Moved.